#37: Don't Allow The Goalpost to Move

The Goalpost Keeps Moving

It keeps moving if you allow it. 

The phrase "the goalpost keeps moving" captures that frustrating feeling when success seems just out of reach, no matter how hard we try. For every accomplishment reached we somehow have another one to work on the next day. In many cases we never even celebrated the one from the day before.

That phenomenon is cause of perpetual anxiety keeping people from living in peace and harmony, as intended, because the moment we reach the finish line it immediately shifts, again.

In the career sense, we get promoted on Monday and arrive to work on Tuesday ready work on the next promotion. People forget to enjoy career itself because they're so focused on the next thing.  It never ends, right? If you want it to there's a way.

Define what success 'Looks and Feels' like to you

This applies to just about anything in life but I'm going to talk about it from a career context and apply specific examples. Here's an honest reflection how I broke this treadmill and started living more. Over time, I came to the following understanding:

more money + more external validation = societal default plan

Hit me at the 15 year mark of my 25 year corporate journey. As I graduated and entered career in 1997, I was well trained by society and school that the idea was to make money and strive for validation. So I did.

• Made Analyst, want to be Consultant
• Made Consultant, want to be Manager
• Made Manager, want to be Sr. Manager
• Made Sr. Manager, wait.... I'm allowing Goalposts to move!! 

Happiness through the societal plan wasn't occurring. Nothing was coming except a few more dollars and a lot more hours. Instead of running myself I was now running large teams of 50-200 people. I enjoyed running teams but 8-12 hours a day and constantly being on the phone or in conference rooms wasn't the life I envisioned.

That was 2013. I woke up realizing freedom wasn't coming, more hours and more competing with coworkers was. And that's when the mindset shift kicked in. That's when I defined my own version of success, one that felt good:

• Seek high client impact roles, high pay, least hours
• Invest 60-70% of pay in real estate, even if I struggle
• Invest in financial self education (books, seminars)
• Invest in experiences (monthly worldwide mini-retirements)
• Shift focus to securing time, financial, & location freedom
• Build lifestyle, leave external validation behind

From 2013 through 2021, turned down promotion to Partner 4x. Made no sense as that was not my version of success nor did the idea feel good. My version included time, financial and location freedom. I worked on that all the time. The final result...

Left career to a pre-built lifestyle in 2021. No more goalpost. No more chasing. No more anxiety.

Stop competing, focus on creating

The mindset shift above played out in policing, military and entrepreneurial careers too. The idea for each was to create good feeling life experiences WHILE making money rather than default competing with peers for accolades and titles.

When I reached Police Officer III, the next logical step was Lieutenant. But I stayed POIII for the rest of my career because I enjoyed patrolling with my friends. I loved being out on the road from 8:30pm to 6:30am. I liked interacting with and helping citizens and neighbors. My kids looked at me as a hero every time I came home in my patrol car. My focus was having fun and creating memories rather than competing with peers for an executive position. Retired happy in 2021.

When I reached Lt. Colonel in my military service, same premise. I was running field offices across the world as a Federal Agent. If I took the promotion to (full) Colonel, my next assignment would have been at headquarters in Virginia. But I preferred to make memories running field offices and leading joint task forces in Germany, Luxembourg, Turkey, Washington DC, Las Vegas, and East African countries like Kenya, Somalia, Uganda and Djibouti as Special Agent in Charge. The stories are endless. The memories are priceless. The relationships are rock solid. Headquarters was not my version of success, my experiences were. Retired happy in 2019.

Real estate is no different. Right now I'm associated with $250M of real estate and about 2000 apartments. I have no desire to go further. I don't need or want $1B in assets or 10,000 apartments. I enjoy what I already created, helping families live in affordable housing as a goal while making some money with partners as a result. It's enough. No need to compete with other investors as to how much we have. I see investors compete with each other all the time. It's all nonsense.

..........

This is all explained in the 4 min video below. Take a moment to absorb the concept of moving goalposts and how to stop them. If you keep this in mind it will help you Try Life On much more, your own way.

- Maurice