#8: Adults Don’t Explore AnymoreJun 17, 2023
Life requires exploration. It’s May 14, 2023.
I’m writing this newsletter finally a resident (residency permit approved and mental ok from self for new permanent lifestyle) of my adopted homes of Lebanon and Cyprus. Breathed a sigh of relief as my life picture became much clearer, finally. I’m genuinely happy. The Mediterranean Sea is home. The family, friends, business, and philanthropy work that I deeply care about are my home.
I’ve been working to be here permanently for some time. The status quo kept pulling me but…
I finally hit breakaway speed over the last few months.
It takes time. You must be intentional. How?
Exploration. Then course correct along the way.
This is what people are afraid to do or can’t see through the fog of life. I understand as I’ve been dealing with it personally. My father helped me. People I dearly love in Lebanon and Cyprus helped me. Life events helped me. We all need a push.
Do you remember as kids exploring and trying new things? I grew up 80s and 90s…
- Playing in the woods behind the house
- Trying baseball, soccer, and football for the first time
- Cutting the grass and learning about machines
- Riding dirt bikes, and learning machines are fast. Mine was a Honda XR100
- Jumping the fence to the neighbors to ‘cut through' and see the other side
That was general life stuff. We explored business too… Here’s how it played out for me.
- Setting up a lemonade stand and earning my first dollar
- Collecting hundreds of empty cans and getting refunds (in Massachusetts)
- Running a paper route of 100 newspapers earning my first hundreds of dollars
- Working at Fayva shoe store at 15, making my first thousands of dollars
- Scoring a paid internship at Gillette. Coupled with the paper route, got my first car.
Exploration is key to happiness. It ignites curiosity and wonder and pushes us into the unknown.
So why do so many adults stop this practice?
Why do adults have lifestyles that repeat day in and day out without variation?
When things get hard during your process, why revert to simple and easy options (status quo)?
One thesis… 20-30 years of formal education, bullshit norms expressed on TV, and suggestions of family and friends not living optimal lives putting fears on you. Frankly, why does society many times suggest success looks like this…
We accept it. When and why did this become a standard?
In 2013, Seth Godin delivered his Stop Stealing Dreams TEDx talk. He confirmed a few things for me:
- The format of formal schooling was designed for people to behave, comply, sit forward fit in, and get the acceptable grade. If not, you were kept back. The format was designed to create people with interchangeable skills, specifically for use in factories during the industrial revolution times. We get 20-30 years of this kind of programming. I’m not talking about topics specifically, I’m talking about the format.
- People became trained to be consumers, not explorers as we’d been, buying and relying on all of the products being created. Too many people are solving issues by buying stuff versus exploring life. Or they revert to the status quo.
It’s a fascinating listen, whether you agree or not.
Christine, my coaching student, inspired me.
Here’s how she’s exploring after being stagnant (her words) for years:
- Learning to be a real estate developer. She has some land and I know a modular apartment builder. She didn’t miss a beat and got connected to explore. Then called the city planner. They told her she’d be approved to build. Now she’s exploring getting funding. At the beginning of coaching, she said she wanted to be a true real estate investor. After 6 weeks, she’s a developer suddenly! She’s trying life on.
- She’s also practicing life between Texas and Cabo, Mexico. Last week she went to the airport, and asked for the cheapest ticket to Mexico. It was $170. She rented a place and stayed for a while. It cost less to be there than just staying at home. She’s exploring living a mobile lifestyle between the two. She’s exploring.
Christine, I know you’re reading this. You inspire me daily.
What about you? What can you do to start exploring?
- Have awareness. Status Quo is a default that you don’t have to accept.
- Create your own lane in business and life just as Christine is doing. It’s your choice to make extraordinary into ordinary, at any time. Fight for it. Fight not to revert to the easy space.
- Do and course correct along the way. Make investments in relationships and experiences. Go explore that thing or person, unapologetically. It’s not easy but break away and leave the status quo behind.
Here are a few things I am out in the world exploring right now…
- Living in Lebanon
- Developing real estate in Cyprus
- Executive producing several TV shows
- Getting married and having more kids even though later in life
- Staying healthy. (Lost 30 lbs, deadlifting 500 lbs. Highest of my life).
Exploring = just do what scares you, get a result, then adjust it accordingly.
But get a result. Try Life On.
It’s easier to do with people you love or a tribe of like-minded souls. Find them.
I talked about it the concept of exploring in the following clip.
In all cases, get to your breakaway speed. Find your home. I did.
Try Life On.
It’s not easy, but you can.